Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Serenade




Hear my pain
Those notes on my head
Let them take you to me
For I'm not afraid of being her

Hear the sorrow
The rage
Bathe with me in these deep waters
For I'm not afraid of being you

Indulgence

I can't count all the ways I've been fooling myself running against the bedroom window. I used to find some self compassion somewhere deep in a sense of me that was in some way something more than a mere illusion.

Now it's just this, a mirror of tastes and smells. Refined aromas in the air. Livid faces and partitures so gentle to the touch that I wonder where I got them from.

In an instant it seemed away. But it's still here.

I walked myself to the kitchen and found a tasty sandwich. Between the bites I could hear the laugther in my stomach as it rolled down the throat trying to find a way not to get in deeper than it should.

Forget that hat and let's take a walk...

The streets appeared in front of me in pieces. I didn't care. I just continued singing inside for a coffee break. That's what I did.
Went into a crowded library to find myself reciting a poem I didn't even have consciously learnt.

I really felt like it in such a day! And it was such a day!

The birds on the trees were singing with such persistent joy that it almost impossible not to follow them even if out of tune.

Suddenly the rain fell... And all turned gray in a quarter of a second... The sadness took over me... I tried to take cover but it was all to late... She always wins...

Got back home feeling imcomplete... Back in bed... Back to dreams... Back to my world...

I was safe... Nothing to worry about... Just the way I liked it...